I absconded from work today. It’s the day for changing linens and I’m not sure i could face the challenges of working now or ever. Sigh. I feel guilty knowing that’s there is lesser manpower because of my absence. I feel scared thinking of what they would be saying behind my back. I guess I would no longer be getting that certificate for complete attendance if I ever hopefully finish the year. I want to be brave but I seem to lack the will.
So I’m going back on duty tonight. And I’m starting to feel butterflies in my stomach once more. I feel this way each time I’m about to go on duty. I don’t feel like moving. I want time to stand still and never go back. Really, if I want to be a nurse do I have to endure this each time I go on duty??? Sigh.
I just lost my wallet that contained all of the money I have to last until the next payout which is obviously still so long. I have dues to pay and I just need money. I can’t afford to let my parents spend for me. 😦 nor can their pockets. I have no other choice but to hope in the goodness of man, if he or she had any. 😦