Left Out

It’s 1:38 in the morning. And I’m still watching the animated series of My Daddy Long Legs. I think that I could very well relate to the main character. But she found love, fought for it and even ended up living happily ever after. I, on the other hand, am a miserable failure. All of my friends now have the privilege to change their FB status to the tagged “in a relationship.” I’ll be 24 soon and still without a prospect. I’m suddenly feeling like a Victorian heroine considered an old maid.
Sometimes, I am sincerely happy being just like this. This means not minding text messages, spending dayoffs at home, meeting friends for dinner or coffee, hanging out with my close friends and the occasional out of town with friends or family. This. But then I also couldn’t help feeling envious when couples celebrate the trivial monthsaries, preparing special gifts, going on movie dates, holding hands.
Really, I just feel pathetic and desperate. Could there be a more pitiful person?



When I started working in the hospital, there was this phase when I really wanted to end up happily ever after with a doctor. Then it sort of died along the way. Then I thought I would like somebody who teaches Math. It seemed manly and intellectual. And today while I was getting blood for transfusion at the Blood Bank, I sat across this guy who seemed genuinely interested in me. And he said he was a Math teacher. And I realized how picky I really am.